Introduction
What is a belief? Dr. Nicole LePera, a holistic psychologist, describes it as a “practiced thought grounded in lived experiences.”[1] She goes on to say that they require both interior and exterior validation to thrive. It has been said that everyone lives in their own reality, our perception is our reality. So, if our perception of the world is nothing but a large system of beliefs being computed over and over again in the computer between our ears that we call a brain, could we agree that this is an important concept to not only be aware of, but to understand it, study it, and influence it? I don’t know about you, but I choose to live in an awesome reality. One where so-called “limitations” are meant to be shattered. LePera goes on to say that continuous practice of certain thoughts “changes our brains, our nervous system, and the cellular chemistry of our entire body.”[2] Beliefs become our truth, our personal truth.
The Case for Self-Belief
What is your dream? Think back to when you were a child, what did you dream about doing? Do you want to fly an airplane, be an actor, be a public speaker, a public servant, a model, president of the United States? I’m here to burst your bubble, believing you can accomplish any one of these things is not enough.
However, believing is the first step. To expand on Dr. LePera’s notion of beliefs being grounded in lived experiences, this is a critical concept to grow one’s self-belief, and ultimately, one’s behavior. Understand: We must feed the machine which outputs self-belief, not only to keep it alive and healthy, but nurture it, to allow it to blossom and flourish. The only way to do this, is through feedback. We must be proactive and create a feedback ecosystem in which our self-belief machine can be fed the inputs it needs to grow.
Create a Feedback Ecosystem
What is feedback? You’re served a plate of green enchiladas at your favorite Mexican restaurant, then you grab the plate to bring it closer, only to quickly discover that it’s hot! On instinct, you quickly let go of the plate. Sound familiar? What just happened there? You received feedback. Let’s break it down: the objective is to grab the plate, then your brain tells your hand to reach for the plate, then you information in the form temperature which your internal sensor (sense of touch), you then decide to either grab the plate or let go of the plate which is determined by how much error you are willing to accept, i.e. your temperature tolerance. See the simple closed-loop control system below (Figure 1).
Figure 1 Closed-loop control system for grabbing a plate
This is a very “science-y” way of saying that we are constantly receiving feedback from the outside world, constantly. This is how we learn; what we like and don’t like, what works and what doesn’t work, through feedback. This feedback mechanism is what grounds our beliefs in lived experience, and the belief is in turn stored in our brain’s memory bank.
Conclusion
Here’s the point: In order to create a new belief system, and to crush the ones that are no longer serving our audacious goals, we must put this feedback mechanism to work. We must continuously position ourselves in a setting that is going to continuously give us feedback so that our belief system, and therefore our self-belief grows, and ultimately our behavior toward our true desires. This is the essence of creating a feedback ecosystem.
Going back to our childhood dream question. Want to fly airplanes? Good, surround yourself with pilots and airplanes – this will give you the feedback you need to grow your self-belief. An actor? Good, move to Hollywood and surround yourself with actors and actresses. A public speaker? Good, join Toastmasters and speak in front of crowds. A model? Good, start modeling and post that on social media (plenty of feedback there). President of the United States? Good, volunteer for your local government and get the feedback you need to learn the ins and outs of politics. Congratulations, you have now created a feedback ecosystem.
Believing is not enough, it must be grounded in lived experience through feedback. This means taking actionable steps, you are what you repeatedly do.
“Everybody has talent, but ability takes hard work.”
– Michael Jordan
References:
[1] LePera, N. (2021). How To Do The Work. New York: Harper Collins.